Ape’s Mars Penis Scoop … Not That Anyone Reddit

As Ape has been absent from the blogging community for a while, be prepared for this post to be a mad rambling on numerous unrelated topics as is usually the case when Ape has a large build up of bullshit in his head. Here goes nothing …


Ape may not be getting the credit but the few of you who read this blog may have felt a sense of déjà vu as you read of the “recent” discovery of a penis drawing on Mars and then thought back to an immature post many months on this very same discovery.


Guess Ape is not connected in the right kind of internet way to make the main stream news on a story centred around galactic appendages like these reddit dudes must be. Though to be honest it might not be the type of thing that Ape would like to have as his enduring legacy from his efforts on the internet.

Ape ponders if this Mars article was a missed opportunity or a dodged bullet.

Anyway back to business and a subject that I am sure many found amusing. The George W. Bush Memorial Library & Museum. I can just imagine people secretly making facetious suggestions amongst themselves to commemorate old Dubya. Hunched over and desperately trying to contain their giggles they would make suggestions such as space suit, chimp suit, or perhaps a Hurricane Katrina civil suit until someone comes up with a gem. “Let's give him a library!” Laughter erupts.


My favourite part of the story is the feature exhibit of the library which is called the “Decision Points Theater” which essentially asks visitors to make decisions on situations like hurricane Katrina or Iraq. A virtual Bush Jnr then pops up to explain his actual decision and the rationale behind it. I suppose the alternate name for this exhibit, “Senate Committee Inquiry” might have been left intentionally available for an upcoming exhibit which might open in the near future based on actual events.

Damn fool son has not even realised yet that this is a joke present. Think of a happy place, think of a happy place…


Another topic that may have gone a little under the radar is the threat by Canada to boycott the next Commonwealth Heads of Government Meeting (CHOGM) to be hosted in Sri Lanka late this year due to suspected war crimes that may have occurred during the civil war. Canadian Prime Minister Stephen Harper has made the statement that Sri Lanka has failed to live up to the Commonwealth values of democracy. Whilst I may agree that violating human rights in any context should never be tolerated, I feel that the bar could be a little bit higher than the values which come to mind when the Commonwealth is mentioned.

I say old chap. I believe these Sri Lankan folk are not living up to the high bar of democracy that so underpins the very fabric of the Commonwealth. Pass me another of those delicious cinnamon tarts my good man.

Yes Ape is another Aussie who will jump at any opportunity to have a dig at the old British Empire and also lament the fact that his country remains a solid member of the Commonwealth. Ape can dream. Sigh…



About Ape No. 1

This famous lowland gorilla was born on July 4, 1971, in San Francisco. He was a gorilla who mastered over 2,000 words in American Blog Language, allowing him to communicate with humans in an astounding way. Some people felt that he was simply making blogs without understanding their real meanings, in order to receive treats and rewards from his readers.
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8 Responses to Ape’s Mars Penis Scoop … Not That Anyone Reddit

  1. “Let’s give him a library!” Ah! Haha! The joke does pretty much write itself with that photo. About the Decision theater–is one of the options to curl up with a cup of hot cocoa and a blankee, then take a nap?

  2. List of X says:

    Yes, I imagine the range of decisions in the “Decision points theater”: Given the classified information we have from the CIA, do we build a new levee system around Iraq, bomb New Orleans, or send a rover to Mars to draw a giant penis?

  3. HoaiPhai says:

    Avoiding the topic of American politics because I live within a drone strike of the border, I have to disagree with you concerning our ties to the Royal Family, my Commonwealth cousin. If not for them we would not have those groovy “On Her Majesty’s Shopping List” emblems on all manner of packaging indicating which are the premium brands of Worcestershire sauce, dark mustard, and intimate lubricants.

  4. HoaiPhai says:

    Pardon my omission. And only the really kinky Royals buy the full-grain mustards. I wonder if there is a brand of penicillin that is regally endorsed as being efficacious in clearing up a persistent case of blue blood spotted dick.

    Speaking of dicks, I cannot wait until Harper follows other annoying Canadians like Justin Bieber and Celine Dion into the U.S. to be swallowed up in their giant crock melting pot. Not only did he push through a whole bunch of laws only cavity search technicians wanted but also set back marijuana legalization about forty years. Just before he got in we were on the verge of having a serious discussion about legalizing a substance that has never itself killed anyone but allowed people to eat vast quantities of food while watching John Waters movies and laughing all at the same time.

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