This Post Is All Scientific Smarts And Sh%t

The scientific community has been buzzing with excitement after local Mexican woman, Rosa Delucia, made an amazing discovery whilst performing the simple domestic task of preparing dinner for her family. The mother of five was peeling and cutting up potatoes when she noticed that one of the halved potatoes had the image of the Higgs-Boson particle clearly visible on the freshly cut surface. In an exclusive radio interview Rosa retold her life changing experience.

“I was just cutting up some potatoes for our usual ensalada when all of a sudden I see this image in one of the potatoes. I called my husband Enrique over to take a look and told him that I think it looks like that Higgs-Boson God Particle thing that the young people are all talking about. He agreed so we called the local media straight away. I hope we get on Ellen because that girl is crazy!”

Rosa Delucia could not believe her eyes when she was confronted with the startling image of the God Particle amongst the ingredients of her family's humble dinner.

Scientists have celebrated world wide as now any doubts to the validity of their earlier findings at CERN can be finally put to rest with this single potato. This find is considered by many to be the single greatest scientific discovery since German butcher Hans Busch discovered a cat stool in front of his shop floor that cast a shadow that described Pi, denoted by the Greek letter π – pronounced 'pie', accurate to 789 decimal places. It is understood that the potato will be donated to the Smithsonian Institute to allow current and future aspiring scientists the opportunity to come and look at one of science's marvels.

Particle physicists have breathed a sigh of relief as their years of study have finally been proven to not have been a fruitless exercise.


About Ape No. 1

This famous lowland gorilla was born on July 4, 1971, in San Francisco. He was a gorilla who mastered over 2,000 words in American Blog Language, allowing him to communicate with humans in an astounding way. Some people felt that he was simply making blogs without understanding their real meanings, in order to receive treats and rewards from his readers.
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8 Responses to This Post Is All Scientific Smarts And Sh%t

  1. HoaiPhai says:

    Yeah, yeah, another elementary particle on someone’s dinner plate story. Some people have all the luck and a Higgs in a potato? Piece of cake.

    Back in the late ’70s I was peeling peas for my persnickety ex and I came across all six quarks, in sequence by mass including Top, which had been predicted by then but wasn’t confirmed until two decades later! Did I get on The Ellen Show, or The Mike Douglas Show as it was known back then? Nope. I just threw those peas into her chicken salad sandwich slush and was insulted for forgetting the celery.

    • Ape No. 1 says:

      I feel your pain Dr Hoaiphster (Phd – Quantum Physics and Masters – Poultry based Snacks). So many scientific discoveries have gone unnoticed due to a lack of celery.

  2. Why is this post tagged satire/bullshit/humor? Please don’t tell me you made all this up. Is there no Enrique? Is he simply a contrivance to advance the plot? You play with fire.

  3. Science constantly amazes me!

  4. List of X says:

    A Higgs boson, you say? Ha! I eat elementary particles for breakfast! Only I need about an octillion of them, otherwise I still feel hungry.

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